Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Its Christmas Time!!!

Editor's note, having now wrote this, there are a BUNCH of pictures.  So, if you are on dial-up, probably best to put a note in your Trapper Keeper to join the new century.

It seems like the longer I'm a dad, the more I'm finding that so many things are best served with plenty of little kid joy sprinkled in - and Christmas is no exception. This year, Christmas is particularly special. My son is finally old enough to really "get" what is going on. He has told not one but 4 santas what he wants, is very curious how the elves are able to make so many toys, and most importantly is just barely self aware enough that promises of coal in his stocking for naughty children make him behave. God bless the holidays.

As you might expect, this means that I've been spending the last 3 weeks or so using whatever I can to get him to act like a human and not someone that was raised by wolves:
  • "You had better be good or else Santa won't come"
  • "Bobo the elf on the shelf is watching, you had better be good or else he will tell Santa on you"
  • "No no, today is NOT Christmas.  You can NOT open any presents today (repeat that one 10x / hour)"
One of the best tools in the parent's "be good and don't put that in your mouth but why are you being so loud and can't you just sit still?" arsenal is the Elf on the Shelf.  Look, I get that the elf is creepy looking and is just a marketing gimmick.  You can't tell me that a fat hairy old man who likes kids to sit on his lap is totally on the up and up....

Anyway, so the story goes, every night the elf flies back to santa to tell him if the kids have been good or bad.....or something. I dunno.  In the meantime, he likes to play tricks......or be naughty.......or basically parents like to do funny stuff to him to help make the holidays more joyous.  As such, Bobo the elf has gotten into a lot of trouble.

As with most things, it started innocent enough with a lot of water bottles.  Maybe he went for a run? Or, maybe he had a bit of cotton mouth?

Bobo must have been running hard to get SO thirsty or he was REALLY hungover

But soon you realize that something is wrong.  I think that Bobo might have a problem.

How many bottles did he drink!? And he is hugging that REALLY tight....

I mean, we really have all been guilty of having one too many glasses of wine and doing things that in hindsight seemed a bit silly, right?

An ENTIRE roll of toilet paper

Why did Bobo put the paper on my toys, dada!?!?

But soon the downward spiral is all too apparent. You fall in with the wrong crowd and start doing things that aren't just silly, they are downright psychotic.

Bobo came in like a wrecking ballllllllll
Better bleach the wrecking ball to kill the herpies.....

Finally, you hit rock bottom. Face down wondering how you got where you were.  Sad, really.  I'm going to put in a word with Santa, seems like Bobo needs an intervention.

It seems like someone might have went on a late night bender and then was hungry for Froot Loops....

Of course, all kidding aside, my son really has been good the last few weeks and we've been able to do some really fun things.  One of the most fun was looking at Christmas lights.  A block/cul de sac closes and has carollers, tons of lights, candy canes, hot coco for sale - the works.  Being in Phoenix, you gotta take every opportunity you can to pretend like it is actually Christmas.

Pretty. Of course, it was like 60 degrees here.

While we were looking at the lights, I took the opportunity to capitalize on the dim lighting so I didn't look like such an elephant man. Unfortunately, my son had taken a few laps of the block by this point so was pretty wound-up. As you can see in the time lapse below, getting a straight picture of him is easier said than done.

Note that MY face never changes though

Decorating the house has been fun too. At the end of the day, while I like the decorations I'm essentially decorating for him.  So, I let him do it however he wanted. Turns out a three year old can only reach the bottom half of the tree. Who knew?

This way he can help tear it down!
(I've since added 3x more balls in the bottom half.  You can never have too many....nevermind)

Doesn't look TOO bad w/ the lights on

Since this is the first year that he "gets" santa, we have certainly seen our fare share. The Bass Pro Shop Santa is one of the best (read: free) but the wait is really long (2+ hrs) - even if he can play on boats and four wheelers during.

Doing his best Goldie Hawn smile.  Looks painful - like watching Goldie Hawn

I went to the Harley Davidson dealer the same day to look at some coats and THEY had Santa....with no two hour line...and live music....and free lunch for a small donation....and free pictures....  Yeah, we're going back there next year for sure.

I think santa was grabbing some Adam sugar from behind

Also, I put together presents - BEFORE Christmas eve!!  I'm as surprised as you are.

Only had 1 extra wheel and a handful of bolts when I was done!

Finally, I really love the holiday season. I love the commercial aspects equally with the religious.  At the end of the day it all boils down to spending time with those you love and showing your appreciation for the year gone by.  I don't mind (that much) that it is pretty commercial with all of the gift giving.  Honestly, if not now - then when?  I for one certainly feel closest to family and friends during this time of year.  If that costs me a Monsters U dvd and a new bike - so be it.

Seriously, he doesn't just wear pajamas....
"no, you cannot have another cookie at 6:30am. Finish unwrapping the chocolates and eat your Froot Loops, those are much better.


Sue's Ramblings said...

I love the elf hugging the wine bottle pic! Merry Xmas Adam and Adam Jr and everyone at home.

Mike said...

Merry Christmas Adam!

HalfCrazed Runner said...

Too funny! Poor Bobo, hope some rehab can help the little critter!