Friday, February 11, 2011

Funny Foto Friday: TSA Follies

While my knees have been a bit sore (due large in part to sitting on the toilet for 5 min during my Sunday long run), my runs have been pretty solid lately. Tuesday 7 mile tempo, Wednesday 7 mile marathon pace run, and this morning was a 7.5 mile track session with 12x400 at 5:30ish pace. Tomorrow will bring an 18 mile long run, and then I’ll pull it back to get ready for the Lost Dutchman Half Marathon. 89 minutes or poop my pants bust.

The TSA (which is the American airport security force) is the butt of a lot of jokes as well as dirty looks from old guys with $4.55 in nickels clanking in their pockets. Normally the people that we see in the airports, wearing royal blue shirts with black pants that look like they were spray painted on, are just doing their jobs trying to protect travelers from nut-jobs with a grudge.

A few months back, the rules changed and the TSA was given authority to do full body cavity searches (or something like that – I’m not sure on the specifics). Either way, a few people got really bent out of shape about what turned out to be pretty minor changes. I was flying every week at that time and they were NOT a big deal. In fact, one person got so cranky that they invented a shirt that was printed with dye that glowed under xray. While their application of it was quite boring, I gotta think that I could have some fun with it. Happy Friday!


Honestly, I'd forget the legal words and just make it so that it looked like I had horse sized genitalia
(click to enlarge)

Be honest, if you worked for the TSA, you'd keep a list like this too:

23 comments:

Jamoosh said...

Security "Force"??? I wonder how many can do a ten yard dash...

gene @boutdrz said...

i don't fly very often (dang it!), but if i DID, MAN, i'd get a set of those boxers. heck, the bra, too, just for giggles. and i'd stuff it with lead.

Runners Fuel said...

Funny!

Runeatrepeat said...

This post is funny, but I don't laugh at the TSA pat downs in real life. Boo.

C2Iowa said...

Way funny!

Al's CL Reviews said...

Too much!
TSA is too. They scare me (although the x-ray/pat down thing is no big deal in ATL...just don't get in that line). I have a TSA ID which doesn't match my DL (middle initial vs. middle name), and so I can't use it to get through the airport.

The Sean said...

well, it is good for the economy- just think of all that replacement shampoo and shaving cream being purchased at destination cities!!!

Kovas said...

I'd like to meet those 3 natural blondes, seems suspect to me.

The Green Girl said...

I love it!

Jill said...

Tell Kovas he is not to touch my daughter, one of the 3!

Adrienne said...

Funny post. Ya, I always feel safer when I'm flying and they are pulling aside and wanding all the old folks with the hip and knee replacements. Especially since moving to AZ where there is a HUGE retirement/old people community :)

ShutUpandRun said...

Wait. You just totally busted yourself. I thought you HAD horse sized genitalia!

TutuRunner said...

i need some of that paint....

Dash said...

hahaha!

RunKathyRun said...

Thanks for the Friday laugh

Rose said...

Wait, not everyone enjoys a thorough pat down? Huh.

Katie said...

I'm one of the 3 too, Kovas! Well as long as sun dyed is considered natural?

I'd love to do this :)

destinationathlete said...

THat's hilarious - and my hubby agrees as well - he hasn't noticed any huge differences and he travels as much as you do!

Chris K said...

Talk about some uptight people. Geez. Some people aren't happy unless they are unhappy.

Kathy said...

There are a lot of frequent flyers who had your same attitude until they started opting out of the pornoscans (yeah, I ahve 4 kids and there is no way they're going through them) and started getting their balls bruised and recent (breast cancer) surgical scars badly bruised because of overzealous TSA buffoons. Then they changed their tune. I'd say the majority of the TSA agents are decent but there are just too many buffoons out there taking too much authority and manhandling people. Also, once you've been raped, the "enhanced" "pat down" (which would be illegal for a real officer, a LEO to do) takes on a whole different view.

Carlee said...

Love the list.

Cynthia O'H said...

Sitting on the toilet for five minutes and solid runs? Right from the start, you had me laughing.

Andrew Opala said...

I think if they actually had an z-ray technician giving you a referral to a doctor for treatment, they would get a lot more support from people. Plus there would be a cost reduction because two federal departments could share costs: Health and the TSA