The TSA (which is the American airport security force) is the butt of a lot of jokes as well as dirty looks from old guys with $4.55 in nickels clanking in their pockets. Normally the people that we see in the airports, wearing royal blue shirts with black pants that look like they were spray painted on, are just doing their jobs trying to protect travelers from nut-jobs with a grudge.
A few months back, the rules changed and the TSA was given authority to do full body cavity searches (or something like that – I’m not sure on the specifics). Either way, a few people got really bent out of shape about what turned out to be pretty minor changes. I was flying every week at that time and they were NOT a big deal. In fact, one person got so cranky that they invented a shirt that was printed with dye that glowed under xray. While their application of it was quite boring, I gotta think that I could have some fun with it. Happy Friday!
Honestly, I'd forget the legal words and just make it so that it looked like I had horse sized genitalia
(click to enlarge)
Be honest, if you worked for the TSA, you'd keep a list like this too: