Thursday, January 27, 2011

Would you pee your pants?

Life has been a bit crazy. No word if my son still knows who I am. In the words of my buddy Chad I’ve put one of my race shirts on the lamp for him to cuddle”. But, for the most part I’m still getting my runs in. They are what keeps me skinny like a little girl sane. Daddy needs his medicine. Fortunately, I only run when everyone else is asleep. Unfortuantley, this is also when I should be asleep…..

Today was a 5 mile marathon pace run – 7:15 overall pace (plan was 7:25). I was scheduled to do 8 miles, however I only had time for 5. It was a good run.  One of those where I really can't remember the first two miles.  Not remembering runs is a good thing for me.  I can space out and just enjoy the moment.

Here in lies my problem: Because I don’t have a training plan (or only a loose one), it is easy to cut these runs short. I’m still going to hit 40 miles this week – but I wish that I had a better reason to stick on my “mental plan”. A heaping spoonful of runners guilt to go along with my absent father guilt. Tastes like failure.

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A while back, I was talking to a bloggger friend about trying to qualify for the Boston Marathon. Fortunatley, he is very close and will likley qualify on his next attempt. Unfortunately, I am NOT as close. I’m still 13 minutes away. Or, one short post-run shower. I like to measure time in incraments of when I am naked. Don’t ask how many units of “business time” 13 minutes is.

Soon, like all of my conversations do, the topic turned to bodily functions. My friend asked the question: “if you thought that you were close, would you pee your pants to save an extra 30-90 seconds?”. My answer? An immidiate yes. I totally would without thinking about it.

Simply put, for me, qualifying for Boston is important enough that I would buck the social norm and keep on trucking. Usually by mile 20ish of a marathon, I’m so hyper-focused on putting one foot in front of the other, even a small break in rhythm throws me off.

So, would you pee your pants? I realize that not everyone wants to, or can, qualify for boston…. So would you pee your pants if you thought that it would help you get a sub 2 hour half marathon, sub 5 hours full marathon, etc etc? Everyone has goals, how far would you go to meet them?

45 comments:

finishingfirsts.com said...

Hands down, yes. I want nothing more than to run a BQ this year and if I have to pee my pants to do it, I will.

Emily said...

Confession: I peed my pants on the bike to make sure I went sub-6hrs in first half ironman.

C2Iowa said...

Yep. Damn right. In the Corps I learned to do a few things that are outside the social "norm". Therfore, for a sub 2 - no question; finish with stinky wet shorts.

Chad said...

This must be a runner thing, the conflict of too pee yourself or not. I think it's assumed that every triathlete has peed himself or herself.

The Sean said...

This is the best reason to choose warmer climates to race in... especially if you are a sweaty person:) and... YES.

Nobel4Lit said...

For a BQ, why not?

Runners Fuel said...

I love it when I can't remember the first few miles of a run, too. That does mean it was a good run! As for the peeing the pants. I hate running with soggy socks (I know from running in the rain, I haven't peed my pants running before). I don't think I could do it.

Kovas said...

I pee my pants regularly, so no problem here.

Angie Bee said...

I would pee my pants for a BQ. I agree with Chad. I thought it was pretty normal to pee yourself in a race. I climbed the fence and did some business in the woods at a race once. The porta potty was like .25 miles up the road but I had to go!
I impressed myself even at how fast I got over that fence!

Dash said...

I hear quite regularly from very fast runners that they do. I have yet to, as any of my issues are another issue altogether which I will never do in my pants! ;) Nuff said! I don't think peeing matters since you are already wet from sweat.

Amanda@runninghood said...

Bummer you have to wait so late to get your run in. That sound exhausting. I am exhausted just waiting until 6 or 7. Yes, I would pee my pants but I don't know that I could...it would be hard to relax enough to get the pee to flow...you know...we naturally have that instinct to hold it in so I'm not sure I could just let it flow. Now shitting my pants is an entirely different issue...I don't think I would do that one. Would you?

Nej said...

In this hypothetical situation....did I know that the option of peeing my pants to guarantee a qualifying time existed. Am I able to wear Depends when I start out.....or am I 100% caught off guard by the discovery, and forced to pee right now my leg into my shoes???

Ah, who am I kidding....Depends, no Depends...I'd be peeing!

bobbi said...

I'm not anywhere near a BQ time, so probably not. Now ask me again if I ever get that fast, and I may change my answer...

Alanna said...

For a BQ, hell yes! However, I'm not so sure that I'd do it to go sub-5 (which I am, btw). There's lots of time to get into the 4hr realm. My PRs are important, but unless it's Boston, not that important... :)

ShutUpandRun said...

OMG if I was close, I would for sure pee my pants and even let a little squirt or two slip out. It wouldn't even have to be for a BQ. I just roll like that. No question. I actually have tried ot pee while running and can't seem to do it.

GeorgiaSnail said...

Since you've already declared that you would pee yourself...Here's the real question...Do you practice this principle on your training runs? kinda like the whole, "don't try anything new on race day" idea...

Rose said...

I'd probably pee my pants for $20.

Okay, not really, but, yes, yes I would. I would also crap myself to break a record/win a really cool award.

I seriously contemplated being "I shat myself" marathon dude for Halloween, but I didn't want to leave chunks of fake poop on the furniture.

Kerrie T. said...

All the cool kids pee their pants. At least, that's what I've heard.

Adrienne said...

So is there something wrong or taboo with peeing your pants? What if your wearing a running skirt? Are you allowed to pee your running skirt?

Jess said...

No, never. Running is important to me, but my dignity and self-respect are more important.

Andrew Opala said...

yes, I would pee your pants!

does Boston have a 5k I can qualify for?

TutuRunner said...

Better double up on your body glide!

Jim ... 50after40 said...

This might sound crazy, but I've tried to pee while running before - I couldn't do it. I guess I couldn't relax or didn't have to go bad enough. I just wanted to see if I could do if I had to in a race. If it was a cold winter race, I might do it frequently.

Jamoosh said...

So here it is: Speed work. Yup. Speed work more than 40 mile weeks will get your to Boston. I know shit - trust me.

Adam Culp (Crazy Floridian) said...

Yes, of course. Someday I hope to BQ. Until then I will pull over and go behind a bush.

n said...

Anyone ever try running with a foley catheter?

misszippy said...

Well, here you go: I've peed my pants numerous times in races! Used to do it on the bike in triathlons of 1/2 IM and IM. Then I had kids and started peeing on the run when going downhill (thanks guys). These days, seems to be under control. But I'd do it again.

Jill said...

WEIGHT TRAINING!!!!! Just saying! 10-15% speedier, guaranteed! You'd then be allowed to stand in line for 90 seconds to use the porta potty.

btw, I get so freaking nervous before a race I have to pee like multiple times; I just factor a 2-minute pee-stop in the equation.

kilax said...

I peed my pants last year at a 5K and didn't care. And that was only a 5K. And all I got was second place in my AG.

40 miles a week is awesome! Man, I wish I could run that much :) Maybe if I lose some weight ;)

Kathy said...

Holy frack. I've pushed 4 kids out my nether regions. I try daily NOT to pee my pants. Sheesh! :)

Pretend this is real said...

Theoretically yes. However, I'm not sure I could relax enough at that pace to "relieve myself." Ah, the catch-22.

Jamie said...

I doubt I would. I would just train harder! Anything to NOT pee my pants. HOW. EMBARRASSING.

EricaH said...

yea i don't see peeing while running in my forseeable future ( i'm not that hardcore) but i do respect your honesty and very entertaining topic for commentary ( you never disappoint)

Chris K said...

I'm sure you Blogging friend who is close to BQ'ing is very appreciative of you bringing this up. I think he will be surprised how many people said yes.

I hope he remembers to wear his black shorts, not gray ones.

BTW, guilt is so effective for me. Coach is very reasonable, just saying.

Alma said...

Absolutely. Let 'er flow.

Psyche said...

Uh, yes. Have you not been reading my blog? It takes far less than a BQ to free the pee:))

ratherbeswimming said...

I'd pee my pants for a BQ, or a sub 4 hour marathon... but I don't think I'd poop them for anything... at least not on purpose.

Morgan said...

If I were cutting it close... one word: YES. Maybe I should invest in some Depends before Cleveland.

funderson said...

I'd need WAY more incentive like..."would you pee your pants for ice cream?" totally..

Pam said...

I don't think I could do it. I mean, I'd WANT to do it, but I just don't think I could physically do it. I can't even pee in the lake unless I'm really drunk. Those muscles just won't unclench!

Julie said...

Cutest baby for sure:) Thanks for posting pictures...he is growing so darn fast!

The Laminator said...

I would most definitely pee in my pants. For a BQ, A PR? I'd pee on myself for a lot less =)

Matty B. said...

Peeing your pants is a modest, low risk proposition to meet your goals. Poo-ing yourself is far scarier and harder to decide between.

So excited that you're taking on that challenge. You're goal-driven personality is going to rock it!

Laura said...

I would pee in my pants for a PR... but I don't think you need to do this. 60-90 seconds??? I don't know what you are doing in the bathroom all that time but my Race "Pee R" is 17 seconds.

RunningLaur said...

I'm not a big pee-er in general, but I can see the case where I might not make the 13 hour cut off for the 50 mile, and I'd totally pee my pants if it made the difference. No way I'm running 49.9 miles to have it not count because of a little pee. (Don't tell people like Troy that though, they might not get it ;) )