Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Baby Odds and Ends

It seems like amongst running (7 miles at Marathon Pace of 7:25 this morning), pooping, and working my fool head off any free time that I have left over is spent getting ready for the baby. I honestly don’t mind spending the time too much because I assume that all of the time I’m putting in now will mean that the kid will basically take care of himself when he gets here. Sort of like how you make lots of preparations for a dinner party so that when the day comes and everything is a disaster you just order take-out. Can you outsource parenting?  I need Nanny 911.

The Friday after Thanksgiving, we had a labor false alarm. All of the signs were there…cramping, aches and pains, nausea – and my wife had some symptoms too!! **Insert Ed McMahon style ‘heyooooo’ She had contractions that were 5 min apart that sort of disappeared by the time they got her all wired in at the hospital. While frustrating, it was good to have a practice run. I am QUITE proud of myself at how cool, calm, and collected I was. As much as I was afraid of freaking out a la Steve Martin in father of the bride, I was probably too tired at 1:30am to do much of that. Heaven help my wife if the baby comes after my morning coffee.

I posted this conversation I had with work on twitter yesterday but thought that it was worth posting again. I get a weeks paid vacation after the baby is born and I was on the phone with HR setting it up.
Work HR: When is your wife due?
Me: 12/13.
Work HR: Dec 13th…..2010?
Me: Yes 2010. She is not having an elephant.  (Whose gestation is 630 days)

Finally, my wife and I took this weekend as an opportunity to perform a little economic stimulus and finish getting the things that we “need” prior to the baby coming. We bought a swing and a chair to rock him in (among other little things). A day or two later when my wife was organizing some things in his room, she realized that we forgot one thing that we MIGHT need.  Baby wipes.  Or, I guess we could just go without.  I'm okay with that.

23 comments:

Jamoosh said...

Are you sure it was false labor or were you denying your child the right to attend the 12 Beers of Christmas... I like him already.

Lisa said...

Love the convo with your HR dept! Classic. I hope your wife is feeling well!

C2Iowa said...

I have to say your comment "...the kid will basically take care of himself when he gets here." needs my input: Adam, up your meds!

HR people live on another planet (I am a former HR Director). Your wit and quick reply was awesome.

Kirstie said...

Your blog cracks me up! Is your HR person alien?? LOL Yes, wipes maybe handy to have for when the baby gets here. ;)

Kovas Palubinskas said...

Nannies are hot! Definitely go that route if your wife lets you (mine won't).

Emz said...

2010?

Awesome.

Is she [hr] blonde?

Chad said...

True story: We are in the labor room, and my wife is progressing nicely. The doc checks her at 8AM, and says "I think we've got another 5 hours." So I go get some coffee and a banana. I get back and the doc is all suited and up and ready to rock. Yeah, we had the baby right then. So I'm holding my wife's knee and counting "Push!" while drinking my coffee. True damn story.

The Sean said...

Do you have a treadmill for the delivery room? I was wondering how long is acceptable to "go get some fresh air"? and how to explain the sweat and short shorts when I return??

Runners Fuel said...

...2010, funny!

RunnuRMark said...

That's chocolate cake that's chocolate cake that's chocolate cake that's chocolate cake that's chocolate cake. Right?? Reality is, there will be "poo incidents". And I'm not talking about SUAR-like poo incidents. I mean shit everywhere. Buy wipes by the case, my friend.

Andrew Opala said...

Listen to Kovas - I did and now I have a restraining order!

But, the stories I can tell about those 5 days in the lock-up waiting for my hearing!

Adrienne said...

December 13th!!! I'm so excited for you two. Your life is about to change forever....it will be so great once you get past the panicky realization of what your responsibility is...shouldn't last more than 18-20 years. Good luck!

RunningLaur said...

totally thought you were going to wikipedia link the elephant. close enough. ok, working, really.

Alanna said...

It all works out even if you aren't prepared. I had Spud 10 days early so no bags packed (and had only put together the crib the night before), but we muddled through.

+1 to RunnuRMark - it's amazing how your life will revolve around poop. Once you're a parent nothing is taboo.

Nick said...

All of the signs were there…cramping, aches and pains, nausea.....are you sure this isn't a running post?

Sounds like my marathon last weekend! :-)

Good luck with the baby...You are going to love it!

Julie said...

Hi Adam,
All of your comments are cracking me up:) You are getting all kinds of interesting advice...good to have.

Holy crap, you are going to be a daddy for real in just a few days!! Good luck to the both of you:) At least you had a dress rehearsal...way to stay calm and cool! Take care!

Jen said...

How exciting! Congrats and yeah, get the baby wipes.

Her Name is Rio said...

Uh, don't skip the wipes. A MUST!
Coming up soon...so excited for you guys!

Shawn said...

Oh dude...as BTO says:


"oh Baby, baby, You ain't seen nothing yet..baaabbbbbyy you just ain't seen nothinnn yet!!!!


Good luck...will be the happiest day of your life!!!

Angie Bee said...

It will all work out and you won't be able to imagine that life was ever complete without this new little person in the world!

Tara said...

I was wondering if you all had a kid yet. I couldn't remember the due date. Good to know it's December 13th. Also good to know that you aren't having an elephant, bet your wife is happy 'bout that too.

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Adrienne said...

Just heard the news from Andrew! Welcome little Hayden...congrats.