Monday, October 4, 2010

Back to running & Breasts (For Baby)

Another weekend gone, another baby prep class completed. This time: “The Art of Breastfeeding: Turns out those things do have a purpose!**” But first, let me talk about my run:

On Saturday, I decided to get back on the running horse and run some form of a long run. I did 10 miles at a 7:50 pace. It is amazing how a few days off can make a quicker pace seem slow. Tapering for running WORKS. Quad pain was minimal however my knee was a bit annoyed at the idea of running again. I suffer from a bit of chronic runners/jumpers knee that is alleviated by wearing knee straps. Here is what I mean:



The cause is almost 100% due to my chronically weak quads. By “chronically weak” I mean that I am too lazy to actually lift weights to fix it. So, because I likely had a self diagnosed quad / hip flexor strain (thank you webMD), my kneecap was put just out of alignment enough to make it sore. With a few days of 100% quad functionality running, I’ll be ready to leave the ice in my drinks and go back to only taking 6 pills a day.  (No more Advil)

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Now on to the breastfeeding class. As I complete each of these classes, I can’t help but wonder to myself how cavemen/women did it. I’m reminded of those Gieco TV commercials: “So easy, a caveman could do it”. They didn’t have classes or books. Of course, then I am reminded that most cavemen had kids when they were 14 and only lived to the ripe old age of 30 AND DIDN’T HAVE TOLIET PAPER!?. How is that never in any of the history books!? I’m sure it was because they weren’t able to get a good latch.

For that matter, cavemen/women didn’t have extremely graphic YouTube videos. I’m not sure what is going on in someone’s head that posting a picture of their child being born on YouTube seemed like a good idea. Let me answer this for you in very certain terms. Unless you are giving birth to an actual alien baby, posting this online is never a good idea. Miracle of life be damned, keep those videos private for special occasions like dinner parties and little Jr’s Bar Mitzvah.

Joking aside, the class was actually pretty valuable. It was about as pro breast feeding as you would expect it to be but still offered some valuable information. While the class was graphic, it wasn’t graphic in a “wow, I should have brought more $1 bills***”. It was more graphic in a Dr 90210 kind of a way****.




**I may have added that subtext myself
***Or should have paid $15.99 on hotel pay per view
****Shame on you if you know who Dr 90210 is. Of course, shame on me as well. Dr Will Kerby was always my favorite anyway.

24 comments:

Emz said...

Yes. I am full of shame.

Will Kerby = straight ass.

Do they come any slimier?!

Jamoosh said...

Same shorts; different race?

Chad said...

I remember Dr. Rey had that skinny blonde wife with the mustache. She was my type.

Runners Fuel said...

Glad you're back!

funderson said...

Its true! We need these classes now because each generation is automatically lazier than the last...what? I sound like your grandpa? Grandpa is right...

track coach and adorable wife said...

I love the guy walking next to you in the race photo! He looks he just had a big fail, poor guy!

Christy said...

Breast feeding. I always get creeped out by the women who just pop it out at random in public...even if they are hiding all things rated R underneath a blanket. I still know what's going on under there, ladies.

who knows. I'll probably be just like the rest of 'em when I decide to have offspring.

...Barbie... said...

dr. 90210 was awesome, but i did hate haley. i thought she was a gold digging crazy lady. but dr. ray was creepy.

ShutUpandRun said...

Now it starts to get interesting. Wait until they talk about delivering the placenta. It's like a second baby.

Ewa said...

Cave men/women learned by watching other cave men/women. They did not use blankets/animal skins to cover when they breastfed their offspring. For some reason we made it into something to be ashamed of.

Adrienne said...

My friend got new boobs from Dr. 90210. I can get his # for you if you like :) Workaholic, creepy, narcissistic, plastic surgeons = nice boob jobs. Glad you are back to the the running. Sorry about your knee pain.

Her Name is Rio said...

Those sleeveless scrubs on Dr 90210 always made me laugh.
And yes, shame on me . Tsk Tsk.

*fingers crossed* for your knees- glad you're running!

Chris K said...

Dude, I'm with you on the weights. I tried lifting them once, they were too heavy. Welcome back!

Irene said...

The next class is about how males can stimulate their own breasts to the point of lactation. I hope you've got a good excuse to skip that class ready.

RunningLaur said...

argh, I think it deleted my last comment. gist:

Every real American knows who Dr 90210 is, and that he does karate in a really creepy manner. eww.

And, I was planning on pulling together a squats / lunges / wall sit workout so that Mica and I can have awesome bulging quads. If you're interested, maybe I'd have a better chance of following through and doing it.

C2Iowa said...

I with you on weights as well. They are almost as bad as burpees.

Running Through Phoenix said...

Breast feeding is like TOTALLY GROSS and all. I mean the milk actually comes out of the boob!! But I guess its healthy and all for the baby or whatever, but gag me with a spoon!

Pam said...

I've never heard of Dr. 90210, but isn't that the cat from Big Brother???

I LOVED HIM!!!

RunnuRMark said...

Yeah, that breastfeeding class wasn't nearly as fun as I was hoping either. And did I forget to warn you to NEVER look at a birth? Make sure you DO NOT watch that baby come out. I repeat. DO. NOT. WATCH.

Andrew Opala said...

welcome back coach!

killer pace!

Jill said...

Glad the knee's doing better. A few leg extensions would solve that. oh yeah, that's a gym thingie.

Spike said...

Lifting weights always makes it to my list of things to be done, but never to the list of things actually done.

Matty B. said...

The wifey and I are going to have a "lactation consultant" help with the breastfeeding when our first is born.

Also, is Dr. 90210 real? If so, does he really cut the sleeves off of his scrubs?

Ed said...

The best part about that 2nd knee brace picture is how you totally caught #552 shutting down (even though he was prob just taking a 20 second walk-break). Perfect timing! Haha!