One of the things that I am trying to do now that I have a bum leg is to be more diligent about my stretching. I was always pretty good about stretching but from what I read I could always be better. When I was reading through the current issue of Runner’s World I noticed a section called “The Body Shop”. It proceeded to display, in cute cartoon fashion, 6 yoga poses that it claimed would help you stay injury free and leap small buildings with a single bound. Who am I to argue.
So, as my wife was getting ready for our house warming party this past weekend and I had just completed a bunch of yard work, I decided that it would be a good idea to sprawl out on the bedroom floor and try some of these fancy yoga moves out myself. I tore out the page that had the cartoons on it and went to the bedroom for ready for business.
To be fair, I made a number of mistakes while performing my first ever yoga session:
-- I was within eyeshot of my wife
-- I grunted more than an 80s softcore porn
-- Most of the stretches were done with one eye on the tore out sheet to make sure that I was doing them correctly – usually meaning that I was straining my neck
Well, sense I was within eyeshot of my wife, she decided to provide color commentary on my little adventure. She would give me encouraging comments such as “Why are you doing girl stretches? All of the cartoons on this sheet are girls”. Of course, to which I would respond with something to the effect of “I can still beat you up!” (Or some other threat of domestic violence). Another time when I was doing something that Runner’s World called “The Triangle”, or as I affectionately call ‘death pose’, I was greeted with the quip, “Boy, you sure are grunting a lot for girl stretches!”.
What did I learn? Yoga isn’t all that bad. Can’t hurt, right? But, from now on, it is going to be referred to as “Manly Stretching”. If you don’t think I’m serious, check the tags on this post! :)