Ruminations

I haven't posted any funny ruminations lately, so here are a few to tide you over!

I hate when someone says that a word "isn't real" or is "made up." All words are "made up" you jackass. We didn't discover the dictionary.
I just saw a commercial for the Bowflex where a guy said "I gave all my fat clothes to my fat friends." Apparently, the Bowflex doesn't shape up your personality.

How has no one invented a "cancel floor" button for elevators?

Shitty economy causes company to cut spending; company decides to take away texting on all issued blackberries; I am left without this crucial booty call tool. I just got cock-blocked by the economy.

I hate it when you're in the car with someone and they get a phone call and turn down the radio all the way leaving you in silence with nothing else to do but eavesdrop on their side of the conversation